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I think shit because they aren't normal noises of people taking are the sound of merriment you get at a party these noises are those noises which two people make when in the middle of or in this case the start of fucking. "ive wanted you all night" i hear womans voice who i vaugely recognise as my mates wife say so i totally reasonably expect to hear my mates voice reply but he didn't "i know you have you dirty slut but don't worry your going to get me" says the voice i don't recognise. i hear kissing and fumbling which i can only think are the noises of hands wondering each others bodies. the door is still open so i have the choice of waiting this out or walking out and interrupting this moment of passion and landing myself in a very awkward situation. but as thinking what the hell i am i going to do i hear the unmistakeable noises of a woman sucking cock. so i think fuck it il stay and try and get a look see as whats going on. i peek around the door and i see my mates wife deep. Gravity would prefer you stay on the ground? Fuck you Gravity, we're flying up in this bitch. Your neighbor somehow hasn't transformed into a snail yet? Well I hope he's ready for a one-way ticket to Snailsville, because that's where he's headed. And despite pouring over countless moldy tomes, swearing fealty to endless secret cults and who knows how many blood sacrifices, nothing has ever come of any of this rigorous inquiry besides allergy flare ups, costly cult membership dues and bloodstains that are almost impossible to get out of a white couch cushion. It has therefore been the sullen conclusion of nearly every would-be wizard and penny-ante alchemist that Magic, that most sublime of Mysteries, simply does not exist.They're wrong, of course. Magic most certainly exists. But it has historically been the case that those with the means and motives to actively seek it out were already more or less free to do whatever the fuck they wanted. Why would a king, upon whose whims men live.
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